Monday, December 26, 2011

Question & Answer

Question:I'm not uncomfortable at all with their friendship. I think it's more jealousy than anything. Occasionally, he seems to get super flirty, and I'll get a little irritated by it. He's made it very clear that he wants to relive that experience. Now, I don't really consider myself "vanilla" (I'm under the assumption that vanilla means boring and unadventurous), but I'm not sure I'm ready to watch my wife be plowed by another guy. I've also recently found out that, after meeting him and his wife, they had a mid-coitus dialogue about swapping with my wife and I. 

First, my apologies for the delayed response, I've been neglecting my blog! Second - don't want you to think I use vanilla in a bad way! To me, vanilla just means non swinger. So, my BFF who is not boring or unadventurous by any means is still vanilla because we don't swing with her - nor does she know about us!

Second, if you asked me (which you didn't really, but apparently I'm going to tell you anyway) it sounds like they're trying to feel your comfort level out. I don't think it's unusual for a swinging couple to talk during sex about other potential playmates, but when they share it with you it makes it more of a testing the water than oh, funny thing about last Tuesday... Ya know? The Hubs and I talk about a few people we know on occasion, but I would certainly never tell them unless I was hoping they'd be up for more fun.

My advice? Keep the dialog going between you and your wife. Make sure you're both talking about what you are and aren't comfortable before you're put in a position you may not care to be in.

The Wife

Sunday, December 4, 2011

Onions + Christmas Trees

A family is at the dinner table.
The son asks his father, 'Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?
The father, surprised, answers, 'Well, son, there are three kinds of
In her 20's, a woman's are like melons, round and firm.
In her 30's to 40's, they are like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.
After 50, they are like onions'.
'Yes, you see them and they make you cry.'
This infuriated his wife and daughter so the daughter said, 'Mum, how
many kinds of 'willies' are there?.
The mother, surprised, smiles and answers, 'Well dear, a man goes
through three phases.
In his 20's, his willy is like an oak tree, mighty and hard.
In his 30's and 40's, it is like a birch, flexible but reliable.
After his 50's, it is like a Christmas Tree.'
'A Christmas tree?'
'Yes - the tree is dead and the balls are just for decoration.'

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Random Confessions

Just some randoms...

Sometimes I want to call my BFF and tell her all about my secret life. Why? Who knows, it's just an urge I get every once in a while. No, I don't think she would judge me but I do think she would put 2 + 2 together and realize I've got the hots for her husband!

Sometimes I get paranoid and think people are talking about me on twitter. Ok more than sometimes...often. I don't chime in and get all nasty, I usually just sulk privately.

I am convinced that at some point someone I know will come across either my twitter account or the blog. Wether or not they know it's me and or tell me they found me is yet to be determined. But someday... It's gonna happen

I am scared to go to a swingers club because I'm self conscious that only gross people would be interested and I have a hard time saying no thank you when I think I may hurt someone's feelings. Dumb isn't it?

As I get older I've grown more and more indecisive. I think there are many factors that have led to the steady decline. What's the root cause, I don't know... I can't decide!


The Wife

Sunday, November 27, 2011

The Friend - follow up

In case anyone was curious The Friend did not text me last night.

No secret playtime or even any random drunk texts. And, even though I was not under any delusion that he would text (the house and my lady parts weren't even prepared for a first date lol) there was a part of me that was curious. And that means by default a piece of me was disappointed. Not like a girl-eats-a-carton-of-ice-cream-bender kind of disappointed but the "eh, he proved me right :( damn"

So does that mean I would do it I push came to shove?

Hmmm..... We may never know!

However - the night was by no means a bust - The Hubs and I made a video with my new hitachi wand and then fucked until I ran out of cum ;) Damn that man can fuck!!!!


The Wife

Saturday, November 26, 2011

The Friend

Even with all of the precautions The Hubs and I take to ensure our vanilla and swinger lives don't cross paths sometimes the lines get blurry...

The Friend of ours is a real friend in our real life. He knows us, he knows our family etc. He has been married or in a LTR for the entire time we have known him... Until recently that is. Yes, I've been attracted to him for a while. But no, I never would have acted on it because of his relationship status(es). Not to say we didn't send the occasional flirt each other's way or an odd drunk text or two but nothing serious and certainly very mild. Until the baseball game.

The Hubs went with the boys of our friends to watch a baseball game. They got their early to tailgate and after a few beers The Hubs was spilling secrets. He not only told the group we were swingers (unsuccessfully I might add - they didn't believe him! lol) he also told The Friend (in private) that if he wasn't attached or married this whole time that I would have invited him home with us by now. 

There was something about that bold moment of telling our secrets that turned me on. And a seed was planted in my flirtatious brain. My flirts definitely stepped up a notch the night I confirmed The Hubs baseball game revelations to The Friend. And in return his flirts have too...which brings us to this weekend. 

A text message conversation began to unfold yesterday that was up several notches on his part. By the end of the night he declared he was sure he was ready to have playtime. I called his bluff and said he could come over tomorrow (tonight) and he should text me when he is free.

Now... I have 100% no doubt he will lose his guts on this and we won't play. The real kicker is I can't decide how I would feel about that. I mean, I talk a big game because my knowledge of this friend says he wouldn't ever go through with it. But I can't help but wonder...

What if...

What if he really did text me, what would I do/say/think? Could I, would I really fuck a real life friend? I go back and forth on hot vs fucked up vs hot vs anxiety producing. Could I relax knowing he was seeing me naked? Or would it be the exciting pay off to the many drunk text flirting build up? What would happen afterward?? I feel confident in my ability to go back to being friends, but would he be able to be comfortable around me again? Is he going to always be thinking I'm for real if I flirt with him? Would our other friends pick up on it all? Will it kill our friendship?

It's an interesting conundrum I often contemplate but never land on what is the right side for me. I'm always curious what The Hubs thinks, sometimes I think he enjoys watching me squirm with a friend and sometimes I wonder if he thinks I would be making a huge mistake but is letting me come to that conclusion on my own. I don't know... so many questions!

Anyone ever fucked a real life friend... did it go well?

The Wife

Question & Answer


Hi Jane,
I have a question, not about the swinger lifestyle. "I am a slut, not a whore... there is a big difference." A quote from your Waste of Time, July 4, 2011 post. I looked up both words in Webster, basically the same definition. What is your definition of slut vs whore? Just curious. Thanks.


This is a good question because this is something that differs for everyone.

Have you ever had a word just not sit well with you? For no real reason it just isn't pleasant to hear it? I have a few, cunt for example, it just rubs me the wrong way. The same goes for whore vs slut.

When I say I'm a slut I think of a sexy woman who loves to fuck for the fun of fucking. Whore makes me feel dirty and not a good dirty! More like for sale or used.

I'm not for sale and I'm not asking for a romance but a little connection goes a long way. To me, that's a whore. Or at least being treated like a whore.

For now, I'm just a proud slut! Thanks for the question!

The Wife

Monday, November 14, 2011

Question & Answer

So far only one question, so here goes...

I've got one that might fall into the "too personal" category, but I'll ask anyway

You've mentioned before that you're a squirter. In my experience that's something not many women can do and some people aren't turned on by it (not me, I'd like to get between your thighs and have you squirt in my face :-) ).

When you're with others, do you feel the need to "warn" them ahead of time that it's possible that you might squirt?

Not too personal at all. It is really hard to offend me! I haven't ever warned anyone before because so far The Hubs has been the only one to get me to that point!

I'm not sure if I'm "difficult" or if I'm shaped super different from other women or I'm subconsciously holding back but so far it hasn't been an issue. However, that said it has almost always come up in conversation before play. So far no one has said anything like uhhh don't do that! Lol

In the meantime The Hubs keeps me going!

The Wife

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Ask me anything

I've have been asked if I mind helping someone understand some things about the swinger lifestyle.... The answer is yes, of course!

I may not answer something (or answer to your satisfaction) if it's too personal but I am more than willing to answer what I can.

I realize this lifestyle isn't for everyone and I understand that understanding it from the outside is a challenge! So bring it on readers!

The Wife

Sunday, October 30, 2011


Hope you all enjoyed this picture of me at my Halloween party... shortly after I accidentally killed my iPhone by dropping it in the toilet.

A moment of silence please...

How exactly did that happen you ask?

Well, it started with the choice not to take my purse into the party. But since I'm a mother I always keep my phone on me in case the babysitter sends out a distress call. About a 1/2 of a Bacardi bottle and a few puffs later I went to the bathroom. Placing my phone on the counter top I then had to sweep my cape up so I wouldn't get it dirty.

I swung my cape a little hard and ended up with the whole thing covering my head... keep in mind I'm drunk at this point - so I struggled with it so I could see and then sat down. Being that I was alone I decided to drunk tweet - which was when I reached for my phone and realized it wasn't on the counter anymore. Insert heart attack as I frantically searched the floor... Then stood up (note - I did not start going potty yet, everyone at the party wanted to know if I'd peed on it! LOL) and found it swimming in the toilet.

This is when I started to repeat "Ohhhh fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck, nooo nooo noooo please please please fuck fuck fuck fuck fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck" over and over. I came out of the bathroom and grabbed the owner of the house by his shoulders and said in my most sober tone I NEED RICE!!!!!!!!!!!

Which is where it remains...

The Wife

Monday, October 24, 2011

The Orgy and Aftermath. Part II : The Aftermath

You may have noticed while reading Part I of this story that there was one sexual pair missing. The Other Hubs never got to fuck The Single Lady. The Hubs and I talked about this on the way home and realized that each time she had the choice of who to play with she picked The Hubs.

Uh oh... drama ahead...

We spoke some the next day, not a whole lot but all was good. So imagine my surprise two days post orgy when I get an email from The Other Hubs saying The Single Lady felt she was pressured into participating and at how fast things started. She also felt "cornered" by being followed to the bathroom. To clarify I asked if he meant the time she followed The Hubs to the bathroom or the time that he, himself had followed her to the bathroom. He responded it was about The Hubs.

Excuuuuuuuse me?

SHE followed The Hubs to the bathroom. The only time The Single Lady was followed by anyone to a bathroom was the time The Other Hubs followed her in and when she came out her hair was all messed up and a few minutes later she announced that she was now pantiless. Hmmm - could THAT be the time she felt cornered perhaps but you are taking it as it was The Hubs' fault.

 Fuck you!

You can come after me all you want, tell me I'm horrible, I'm this or that but question The Hubs' character and I completely lose my shit. The Hubs is THE most stand up man I know, and I saw with my own eyes this woman come after him. And I saw with my own eyes her chose The Hubs over The Other Hubs. And I HEARD HER tell The Hubs that she wanted to fuck him again.

All I could do was respond with the facts. She followed him to the bathroom and she made the moves on him so if she was too drunk to remember that then maybe she shouldn't have been there at all.

No response.

I believe she meant to tell him that she was uncomfortable when he (The Other Hubs) followed her to the bathroom, and how quickly he advanced on her, not The Hubs. But he uses this as an excuse to cock block future meetings for us with The Single Lady without him and his wife.

To quote a twitter friend "People like that need to turn in their swingers card"

The Wife

The Orgy and Aftermath. Part I : The Orgy

I'm still somewhat exhausted from the night so I can only hope I do the party justice. We went to a Halloween party at our swinger friends' house. They had invited a recently divorced woman who wanted to try getting into the swing lifestyle. She had never done anything before, so we knew the possibility of her not only participating but wanting to play with us specifically (since we were the strangers to her) was slim to none. We really didn't care, we were just there to have some fun and see what happened.

When we first got there The Single Lady was attractive and very nice but also very shy. We had snacks and hung out for a while getting to know each other. Eventually she warmed up and we settled into a few drinks and conversation all around. Not wanting to make her feel uncomfortable The Hubs and I stayed away from swing conversation as much as possible. No, we didn't skip all sexual referencing - I mean I would have to basically not speak to cut all of that out. But there was at no time any hint of reference made about playtime.

The night moved on and eventually I realized The Single Lady was making moves on The Hubs. Not flirtations, full on physical moves. She pulled his hand under her pussy as she sat on the couch so he could finger her. When he got up to stop she followed him and pulled him back for more. She clearly wanted to fuck him, especially when she followed him to the bathroom!

The time of the night came to move into the bedroom and the hotness began. It's hard to give a play by play  because I was trying to watch and participate as much as possible so here are some of the positions we had going on.

* The Hubs eating The Other Wife while fingering The Single Lady while I sucked on The Hubs cock and stroked The Other Hubs cock.

* The Other Hub eating me out while I licked on The Single Lady's nipples while The Hubs ate The Other Wife while she ate The Single Lady

* The Other Hub fucking The Other Wife while she ate The Single Lady while The Hubs got his cock sucked by The Single Lady and fingered me (that was amazing BTW)

* The Other Wife and The Single Lady making out while The Hubs fingered them both and The Other Hubs fingered and licked my pussy

* The Other Hubs fucking me while The Hubs fucked The Single Lady and The Other Wife watching

* The Other Hubs and The Other Wife fingering The Single Lady and playing with her breasts while The Hubs fucked me.

* Me sucking The Other Hub while The Other Wife cums on The Hubs face and The Single Lady watched

There are more, because I know I sucked The Hubs cock on at least two other times, but I don't know what the fuck was happening because I was distracted!

When we were all spent we cleaned up and headed home. All the way home we rehashed our favorite and least favorite parts of the entire night. This is our usual, but this was clearly amplified by this being our first orgy! When we got home it was really late, but we always end the night with a follow up fuck. Which, is one of my favorite parts of our swing life. That night was a two round follow up fuck, and the second was even harder than the first!

I woke up the next morning unable to walk... a small price for so much fun.

The Wife

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Just when I thought I had seen it all

Today I got an email on one of our online profiles from a single man. I clicked on his page to view his profile and see what his story was. He had several pictures including a face picture, and he wasn't bad looking. Only one problem... in his pictures sometimes he's white and sometimes he's black.


His face picture shows a very dark skinned black man - yet his body is Casper-the-ghost white in some pictures and dark in others. Of course, this means he's either Michael Jackson come back to life, or at least one aspect of his profile is fake.

I encounter fakes more than I wish to recall, (see post) because let's face it - there are a lot of weirdos online, especially when you are talking about sex and sexual things! But, seriously - if you are going to go to all the trouble to make a fake profile can you at least pick one race and go with it? I mean, isn't that the basics?  I can't help but wonder if this profile works on anyone. I'm tempted to ask him, but I know there really is no point other than to satisfy my my desire to tell him he's stupid!

Oh well... back to the drawing board...

The Wife

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Going with my gut

Recently I was surprised by a conversation with a single male potential playmate. It was our initial conversation and I asked if he wanted to see a picture of me since he sent me one. His response is what got me - no thanks, he said.


I'm not saying I'm a super model with the most amazing pics ever but a single man always wants pics. Married men have access to pussy any time they want. But single men always want more pics than you send, no matter how many you send. This guy, no thanks he didn't want any!?!

Red flag. But not enough to disqualify you, maybe you don't like pics... Maybe you are at work and can't get them, maybe you just don't give a rat's ass about what I look like as long as I can suck & fuck? I don't know, but it is odd so I decided to stay alert.

The next day I realized he has two yahoo screen names. He logs into one and then from that into another instant messenger name. I'm not sure what the purpose or how this would be done but it was odd. It was a brief conversation when he signed off he said he was going to work out he'd be back on a few days from now. (he gave the day of the week, so it's not a typo) huh? You're planning on being at the gym for a few days? Before I could smartassly say that he (out of the blue) says that he has plans next weekend but the weekend after that looks open.

Nice to know, I thought and he was gone, signed out presumably to hit the gym. Then I logged in to our website where we met him. In my inbox was a message saying that user had been deleted for misuse or something to that effect.

Hmm, now the profile full of nutbags has blocked you... I think that's enough strikes for me too. There are too many "huh" moments too early in getting to know him.


The Wife

I thought I knew what I was in for...

The evening started out pretty normal. The Hubs had come home with a 6-pack of my favorite cider (see #81 & 82 100 Things about The Wife) and some dark chocolate. My estimation was he wanted me drunk and appreciative for an extra special blow job. The Saturday evening carried on with drinking, dinner and some smoking.

After all of the other members of our household were in bed we watched some tv and hung out for a while. He pulled out a few toys for cleaning and posted some cryptic messages on twitter about our night ahead. I could tell he was planning on being rough. (Which is not something we do all all the time) He gave me a few whips over the course of an hour or so, and then I got up to make the check in rounds of the house.

As I made it back to our bedroom I saw the door was slightly pulled away from the wall looking like someone was standing behind the door. Knowing that The Hubs likes to scare me I walked slowly into the bedroom bracing for the jump-out-and-scare-me moment. Two steps into the bedroom and no sign of The Hubs until I heard the faintest sound of footsteps and before I could comprehend what was taking place my tiny g-string had been ripped off of my body (like seriously disintegrated with one rip) and I was being blindfolded and led around by the tight grip on my neck.

That was just the beginning...

Soon my hands were tied to the headboard of the bed, with my feet being strapped at my ankles and then pulled up in the air by a strap he can tighten. (In my head I thought, "oh I totally forgot we had this thing") I felt his tongue go to work on my helpless pussy as I wiggled around in pleasure. After I sprayed his face he moved on to the fuck saw... (see #86) which is hard to handle when you are tied up and can't contort my body in ecstasy like I normally do. This time I sprayed so much that I hit the wall behind me (and my leg in the process) even with my blindfold on I could tell that it was a big one... 

In between rounds he would take my head and lead me to his cock and force it as far as he could down my throat. The whip also stayed out, and anytime I said "ouch" I was punished a little bit more... He continued on with two more toys fucking me as if we were in a gang bang, each time I had to spray him to get him to stop. Finally he said the gang bang was over, and as always he takes me last. With my hands and legs still tied in the air, and my blindfold still tight over my eyes I felt his rock hard cock slide into my dripping wet abused pussy. He fucked me until I begged him to cum with me as I exploded on him one last time.

It was an amazing, and epic night of cumming and sharing experiences beyond our normal. And, like I said... I thought I knew what I was in for!

Heavy S&M isn't really my thing, but I know that The Hubs is really into dominating. So sometimes we do it, and  I go with it, and I get off on the enjoyment he is having (well and it doesn't change the fact that he's eating & fucking me crazy good too!) from dominating me. I know the safe word and I've seen his ability to go from 10000% to 0% in a millisecond at it's use. Now, I'm not saying what we did was in heavy or hard core but for me, who is usually a lightweight it was more hard core than we had done before. The adrenaline of the grab was real he did a great job, I never saw him or heard him and I was even expecting to be scared. I've never seen panties fall apart that easily. He made it look like he was ripping off a piece of Velcro, I barely felt them disappear.

Did I mention it was epic?


The Wife

PS - A blow job followed about a 1/2 hour after I was untied :)

Saturday, October 15, 2011

100 Facts About The Wife

I saw this on a friend's blog and wondered if I could do it and maintain my mysteriousness... So here goes nothing...

These are all 100% factual about me, and I tried to put them in some random sort of order.

1. I am the youngest child
2. The Hubs and I met when I was 16
3. I was the first child in my family to get married
4. I took the longest out of my entire family to graduate college.
5. I have bungee jumped
6. I was in the band in high school
7. I am a mother
8. We have had 3 dogs in our marriage, all have had "B" names (by coincidence!)
9. I've lived in the same city my entire life
10. I smoke weed
11. I love to fuck
12. As of 2012 I will have known The Hubs for longer than I lived without knowing him
13. I was very religious as a teenager
14. Before meeting The Hubs I was determined to stay a virgin until I got married
15. We dated 6 weeks before I gave in and we banged
16. My guilty pleasure is celebrity gossip
17. I only had 2 boyfriends before meeting The Hubs
18. We have been married 11 years
19. If my Mother were reading this she would have figured me out by #2
20. I am lucky to be married to Lorenzo Von Matterhorn, aka SwingerHubinFL & The Hubs
21. I can touch my nose with my tongue
22. I was a bank teller for many years, using my time to flirt with the customers
23. I lust after my best friend's husband
24. I would like to to think "loyal" would be one of the words used to describe me, which I find ironic coming from a swinger
25. The Hubs was my one and only sexual partner until we got back into the swing of things after our swing break.
26. I only wear thongs or g-string underwear
27. My hair has been blond, brown, red and black. Sometimes more than one at a time :)
28. Every "I'll never" I've ever said to The Hubs I've ended up eventually trying at least once.
29. It took me 8 years to get a BA and now I don't use it.
30. I have flashed my boobs for beads on Bourbon Street in New Orleans.
31. I work from my home for a large national company
32. I'm addicted to Starbucks
33. I don't drink any coffee except one drink from Starbucks
34. I used to smoke cigarettes on the down low
35. I wasn't allowed to watch Three's Company or The Golden Girls as a kid - oh, or The A-Team.
36. I'm an amatur photographer, but I do everything by sight and feel and I know nothing of aperture and lenses.
37. I make some money off of my photography, but if I won the lottery I would do it full time in a blink of an eye.
38. I am a worrier, and it sits on me sometimes.
39. I believe that when women are pregnant their brains are rewired to be able to think 3 steps ahead of everyone at all times.
40. I'm constantly multitasking.
41. Last year I made The Hubs a photo book of me in sexy lingerie. I set up a tripod and ran in - which is hard to do in heels, thigh highs & a garter!!!
42. The compliment I hear most often from my face picture is about my smile.
43. I'm never sure if that's code for something else? lol
44. My facebook account is completely vanilla, my twitter is completely non-vanilla.
45. I refuse to open a vanilla twitter account because I'm terrified I'll mistake the two and spill the beans to the world.
46. I am very nosey. Even if I'm not asking the question I'm wondering about it...
47. My outer appearance gives the impression that I am a goodie-two-shoes suburban soccer mom
48. Part of the turn on for me is the two sided nature of being a swinger and a soccer mom.
49. I am a huge flirt in my vanilla life
50. We have one friend who knows about us, and when he gets drunk he texts me. It won't ever happen, but I'd do it! lol
51. I listen to all kinds of music
52. I am a push-the-button-and-see-what-happens kind of girl
53. I only enjoy rough play with The Hubs because I know he would never really hurt me. Whereas I talked to a woman once who said she couldn't do it with her husband because she knew he would never hurt her. lol
54. My back is highly erogenous for me
55. I have a wish list on Amazon, but I'm too embarrassed to ever say anything about it
56. I went through a country phase - boots & all...
57. I played tennis when I was a kid, not very well but I still did it! lol
58. I have offered (to their faces) to be the judge of who has the bigger cock contest between two of our friends. So far they both puss out :(
59. The Hubs and I have had sex in just about every place you can imagine, including multiple times in a church parking lot that was close to my parents' house.
60. When we got engaged I was 18 and he was 20.
61. If I tried to explain my job to you I would lose you in about 30 seconds.
62. I've never done any drugs besides weed and
63. I didn't start smoking weed until I was 24 years old.
64. I once "rescued" a kid from a swimming pool. He fell in while we were drying off and before anyone else noticed I jumped in and got him back out. I think I was like 9 years old, and he was 1. To a 9 year old I had saved his life and the world! lol
65. I got my first job when I was 17 and I've worked ever since. I'm not sure why I was so eager to start working but I don't get to take a break now!
66. I'm unbelievably sentimental
67. I believe in buying local and supporting your community
68. I'm a couponer, not a crazy one like on tv, but I'm cheap so it's right up my ally
69. I am 5'8" but I love heels, so I'm usually taller
70. I once dated a guy that was shorter than me and I never got used to it.
71. I'm very sarcastic
72. I want a boob job. Nothing insane, just generously proportionate to my body :)
73. I do not have any tattoos or piercing (except ears) but
74. I have thought about getting one or both of them.
75. I have blue and green eyes
76. My reading interest comes in waves. I go through times when I'm reading constantly and others when it takes me months to get through a book.
77. 10 years ago I was wearing hose and heels everyday to work in a business suit. Today I wear my pajamas or underwear. Upgrade!
78. I do my very best not to shop at Wal-Mart. I think they are a horrible company and in general their stores are disgusting.
79. Our official political affiliation is opposite each other, but The Hubs and I are both very middle of the road.
80. Right now I'm wondering how many of you are still reading this?
81. I don't drink beer because I find it disgusting. I like a variety of the girly drinks or I'll drink a hard cider. Look it up...
82. My favorite is Magners, which I always laugh when people think I'm talking about Magnum condoms! hahaha
83. I am a chocoholic. Dark chocolate, please and in almost any form.
84. The Hubs and I have been to Las Vegas together 3 times in the last 4 1/2 years with another trip planned in a few months
85. We own season tickets to football program that neither The Hubs nor I went to the college.
86. This is my favorite sex toy
87. Sometimes I feel guilty about how much time our lifestyle takes away from me being Mommy
88. I lost my virginity to The Hubs and then drove myself to pick up my high school class ring
89. I fucked my high school crush in a MFM setting a few months ago :)
90. I have let The Hubs play alone a few times, but I don't feel ready to play alone myself - despite having his permission. Strange, I know...
91. My first car's driver's door didn't open. You had to climb out of the passenger side, I was super cool though.
92. I've travelled outside of the country only one time and it wasn't that great because of the people I was with... would love to go back and do it right.
93. I use the word "Fuck" a lot. I have to really pay attention when little ears are present.
94. I don't like talking on the phone, I prefer to text
95. There are certain fashion trends that I don't think I'm cute enough to pull off
96. I am VERY loud in bed. I try to tone it down, but usually I can't help myself.
97. I can squirt, but as of now only The Hubs has been able to get me to that point.
98. I don't consider myself bi-sexual or bi-curious. I'm straight, but to me that means light play, touch, kiss but no oral.
99. I have had alcohol poisoning and probably should have gone to the hospital. 12 years later and I still can't even smell the drink without getting sick.
100. It took me 3 days to think of these facts, and I'm very curious what number is your favorite!

The Wife

Monday, October 10, 2011


The other day I sent out the following tweet:

Jane Smith
As a general swinger rule if you are more interested in me than your wife I am no longer interested in you :)

I think this needs further clarification....

This means -
If you keep secrets from your spouse
If you no longer have sex with your spouse
If you belittle your spouse's appearance
If you seem to use swinging as a means to fill a void because your no longer find your spouse attractive.

These are examples of some things we have run into and they all fall into the category of "no longer interested".

For us, there are zero secrets. And we aren't like the couples who say they share everything and then in chatting it comes out that they take steps to hide things. My favorite example of this is the couple we chatted with that claimed to share all details. Then in chatting with The Hubs it came out that the wife would be sure to delete their texts from during the day, and used work as an excuse to get out of the house and have secret time with playmates. In fact she had basically had an affair with a playmate, yet they claimed to share all details... hmmm.

We love having sex with each other, in fact so far no other man has been able to live up to The Hubs skills. (Challenge Accepted, anyone? lol) So there is no void being filled, no lack of enjoyment being sought. This is fun we have together, as a couple enjoying sex and our sexy spouses.

And, for the record - if The Hubs ever belittled me to a playmate he'd be finding his own ride home. But, I know he never would because he was bothered by it for that wife. It was awful!

Hopefully this will clarify my tweet. I know it seems like this is a women-are-never-happy thing since I'm constantly bitching about the right amount of attention etc. I'm not here to fill your wife's spot as sexiest woman alive in your eyes, I'm just a slut who likes to have fun!

The Wife

Here's to the nips...

Thursday, October 6, 2011

The Cluster Fuck

I can only describe this date as The Cluster Fuck that it was... it has taken me several days and since it's so fresh I will have to be a bit vauge on some of the details just in case they are readers...

It started off fine, we spoke all week about getting together and The Cluster Hub was eager to get back together. We have played with this couple before and met in a non play (yet not really vanilla either) date on another occasion. In every conversation between both The Cluster Hub/Me and The Cluster Wife/The Hubs all signs were that we were playing. So we got an overnight babysitter, stocked up on condoms, waxed and headed out for dinner.

Dinner was casual and nice, easy conversation and good food made for a nice time. We made our exit and headed for their house as was the plan. We started drinking and just hanging out chatting. Everything was going along totally fine - if you were on a vanilla date.

Just one interjection here - we don't mind vanilla dates too. We enjoy these people outside of the bedroom but a vanilla date is not an overnight babysitter night. That is a pay-the-teenager-and-save-your-overnights-for-playtime sort of outing.

But there we were, confused by the general mood of The Clusters. The Cluster Hub was clearly eager, sending me text messages from across the room, while The Cluster Wife was 100% vanilla and seeminly more and more annoyed with The Cluster Hub for his text messages. After all she was sitting next to me on the couch, she knew who the messages were going to!

Six hours into the evening he told me the lamest excuse ever, but basically saying that they would not be playing tonight. It was her call and she had bult a road block of veto. I passed the message along to The Hubs and we made our goodbyes a little while later. We got in the car and started putting all of the pieces together.

Through the conversation I determined that The Cluster Wife has no idea that her husband is emailing me an average of 25 (no joke) emails a day from work. I know this because she made it clear that they can't talk during the day... hmmm... ooook. I also figured out that she really hates the texting across the room. Can't really say I blame her on that one, I'm not a fan either and neither is The Hubs. It's rude and a tad immature, if you want to flirt with someone do it out loud. We all know what we're there for, and if you can't say it in spousal company you probably shouldn't say it anyway. But trust me, when I ignore him he just sends more and more and more. The icing on the cake is that when I went to the bathroom he tried to follow me and she told him to sit down.

Bingo... we have an uncomfortable wife.

At least that's my theory based on the excuse - because seriously it was so bad I can't even tell you. You know how you can blend in the stories so that you could generally be talking about any number of people - well I highly doubt that this one has ever been used, and I sure hope it won't ever be again!

I'm not really sure where this leaves us with them, I'm going to need some assurances that she's comfortable with me or I won't be comfortable playing with either of them! And he needs to be a little more attentive to his wife, just because The Hubs is hoping to play with someone doesn't mean he ignores me!

I guess we'll just have to wait and see what happens...

The Wife

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

The Pea

Do you remember the story of The Princess and The Pea? The Queen puts a pea under the mattress and no matter how many cushions are brought in the Princess still feels the pea...

Recently I discovered there was a pea under the mattress for The Hubs and myself. A few months ago I found The Hubs starting to pick up the term "Hun" (side note - I still don't know where this came from in 15 + years I've never heard him use this one) For some reason every time I heard it or read it I would cringe. Like make me uncomfortable cringe. Which made no sense, even to myself as I felt/feel 100% confident in the solidarity of my marriage. But there was just something about it...

I decided that I would not tell The Hubs about this until I could determine if I was just being sensitive. After all, I know that at least once a month I'm certifiably crazy. So I thought about it,  I tried to place my finger on what exactly the issue was but no matter what I couldn't pin point the origin of the yuck factor. I had no explanation other than it just rubbed me the wrong way.

Eventually I decided to let it go and just chill out. It was never that I felt uncomfortable with The Girl, or with The Hubs and my arrangement so there was no reason to keep stewing on it. Quickly that word died away and the problem was solved on it's own. Then last week The Hubs was reading a conversation I had with a male playmate. In the message I called our friend "dear", which I tend to do a lot. I use "dear" on vanilla, non vanilla even sometimes on work people. But this time it made The Hubs admit that he really didn't like that one.

I started to laugh as he tried to explain his objections to me. I didn't need any explanation, for me his discomfort is enough for me to move on and he wasn't mad at me. But  I couldn't help but think of the "hun" freak out a few months earlier. I told him about it and we talked it out and laughed at our inability to explain ourselves.

It was a reminder that no matter what your standings are, arrangement is or comfort level with your spouse there is always the possibility of  finding a pea under the mattress. And as The Princess found out in the story you can't ignore the problem, you just have to find and fix it.

Luckily for me The Hubs and I are very good at our "no explanation needed" policy. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work period.

So what do you think? Ever have a pea type issue like us?

The Wife

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

The Effects of Blogging

In our early days of experimentation The Hubs would tease me with erotica he found online or wrote for me. He would get me so turned on it was hard not to attack him when he got home! So you can probably imagine how flattered and honored I was when I heard from a reader that he used my blog to tease his wife recently! I asked (nicely!) for a description and he has so kindly shared with us...

Without further delay, I give you my first guest blogger post, written by The Traveling Man.



In spite of popular belief, not all men loose their sexual drive as they get older (I hate that "older" label). I’m horned up most of the time, must be due to the French and French/Canadian blood.

The Tease

So this trip I decided to tease/torment my wife while I was gone. I found a couple blog posts from, SwingerWifeInFL, which hit on one of her favorite fantasies and one that we have lived out, MFM. So Wednesday afternoon I sent her an email with the links and a subject line telling her to read these after the kids were in bed. Well being the typical impatient woman that she is, she read them right away.

Ah, the IM messages I got after that were priceless. Here I am in a major web architecture design meeting, all horned up (visibly) and getting messages from a horned up wife 3000 miles away, knowing that there was no payoff until Saturday evening.

Not quite sure who got teased the most out of all of this one.

The Payoff

I'm in the sitting area of our bedroom watching TV. My wife comes out of the dressing area in her silk robe and black/purple lacy thong. Instant visible hornage moment!! ;)

The lights are dim. She sits down next to me and I immediately start to lightly massage her lower inner thigh. The response is immediate. A soft erotic gasp.

We start to talk about the blogs I sent her. Her eyes are closed, her head is tilted back. I ask her about her favorite parts, as she starts to tell me, I work my way slowly up her thigh.

Her nipples have responded. Her breathing erratic as she further details the blog story. I start to remind her about the MFM experience we had. Matching it with the details of the blog story that has her completely aroused.

My fingers have reached their destination. She is completely hot. Her thong completely wet. She is clearly ready but more importantly wanting another MFM or MFMF experience. She's begging me to stop, not wanting to have an orgasm yet. But being true to my French heritage, tell her to relax and let it happen. She submits. What a submission!

We start to talk more about the MFM opportunity. Salted tells me that one of the people at her breakfast hangout has been making some interesting conversation. The most recent was asking if she and I would like to go meet up with he and his girlfriend. I think she is nervous telling me this. I'm slowly teasing her nipples, I look at her deep in her eyes and ask her, do you want to fuck him.

She pauses. I follow with do you want his suck his cock. She smiles and says "yes while you’re fucking me". At the same time she reaches over and starts massaging my quite erect cock. We continue to talk. She tells me she has not told him that we swing, we're still pretty new to this. I tell her that I'm interested in meeting. We have never done this, and we are both nervous. She is more turned on.

She tells me about a website she goes to when she's turned on and I’m not around. How she'll sit at her desk in the home office, bring up the site, slowly start to please herself. At this point I'm completely worked up! Oh Yeah!! She stands us up, takes me over to the laptop, brings up the site, with a video of a FMF (she knows how that gets me), and begins to work her magic on me (with some lube help ;) ) while having me watch the video. Finally she beings to orally take me to a whole new level. She stops, after taking me right to the edge.

She asks me to find a MFM blog and read it to her. So I hit the site, find one, and slowly read it to her, quietly whispering the details in her ear, as we both massage her clitoris. As the story ends, we make our way to the bed.

Once in bed we both orally explored each other. For me, there's nothing more satisfying that the sound a woman makes when being brought to the edge. I love the heat, the intensity, the taste.....

After she can take it no more, she climbs on top of me. I'm lightly biting her nipples as she is slowly riding and squeezing my cock. Until I could no longer take it....

Friday, September 23, 2011

Open Positions

The Hubs and I are currently accepting applications for positions as The Unicorn (single female) and The Boytoy (single male). Problem is, both searches are annoying and frustrating in their own distinct ways...

The Unicorn search is lonely. We'll shift through the few profiles and then try our best to remember who we have already chatted with. Then we'll send out the initial "feeler" email. And then you wait.

And wait...

So you go to the instant messenger to look for anyone to offer your Husband's sexual skills to. But there you find a random slew of non matches or people who aren't at their computer on.

In it all you may come away with a handful (if you are rock star lucky) of potential playmates to begin chatting with.

Starting to understand why we felt somewhat sad for ourselves when we lost The Old Unicorn. We were so happy that she was starting a relationship but damn, we were back to the drawing board! Boooooo!

Then there is the search for The Boytoy. This one isn't lonely it's crowded... Too crowded. It's like searching for a needle among a pile of needles. In there somewhere has to be just one "normal" dude right?

So I sift through the countless cock pics and bad profile descriptions. Try to find one who seems like he will be cool, no drama and isn't going to be pushy. We'll send emails to guys even if they are clearly out of my league. And, if we're rock star lucky we'll end up with a few handfuls of potential chatters.

The Boytoy applicants tend to shoot themselves in the foot pretty quickly, so it's a numbers game. Most want to fuck right then. That works for some people and I'm not saying we have never done that but most of the time that doesn't work for us.

Then there is The Fakes, The "Married" Men, The Too Young, Too Old, The Weirdos, The Freaks and The Morons. And please don't tell anyone that I work from home, or they start in on the "nooner" requests.

Sounds fun right?

Yet, I'm not ready to give up playtime so I guess it's time to just suck it up and start looking...

Oy, wish me luck!

The Wife

Sexy Story: The Hotel Bar

It was something I had always wanted to experience but being the good girl I never really expected it to happen, yet there I was sitting in the hotel bar waiting for Colby while Jack (my husband of 10 years) sat at another table watching.

Colby and I had been chatting online for a week or so and his flirtatious nature and webcam shows had really gotten me excited. I had only been with Jack, so the lifestyle was all new to us and the anticipation was growing by the second.

I sat sipping my drink trying to act casual as my pussy tingled under the table. I was doing my best not to catch Jack's eye from across the bar, I knew if I did I may melt into a horny teenager and rip his clothes off right there. Instead I waited for my "date".

I saw him walk in and as casually as possible he made his way over to my table. When he sat down my heart was pounding and my pussy dripping wet. We started talking and had a drink while getting to know each other. After a few minutes I told him our room number and made my exit. He was going to wait 10 minutes and join us.

In the elevator Jack was already hard as a rock. He reached up my dress to find my bald wet pussy pulsating with desire. We could barely separate ourselves as the elevator reached our floor.

Once in the room I cleaned up and put on my new lingerie. I had chosen a sheer lacy black top with a barely there g string and a sexy new garter belt. My black lacy thigh highs attached completed the outfit just as there was a knock on the door.

Jack sat down by the bed stroking his cock as I went to get the door. I opened it just enough to reach my arm out and pull Colby in by his shirt.

Jack watched with huge horny eyes as I threw Colby down on the hotel bed and started working his clothes off of him. I started with his shirt, kissing and nibbling my way down his chest over his hot tattoos down to his belt. I heard Jack moan with excitement as he watched me undo Colby's belt and pull down his pants. Colby's hard cock sprang up from his underwear and I gave it a little teasing lick as I finished pulling of his pants and underwear.

I looked over at Jack who was grinning from ear to ear and motioned for him to come join us. I stayed on my hands and knees with Colby on his back as Jack came behind me and started to lick my pussy. I instantly started to moan as Jack licked on me while I took Colby's cock deep into my throat.

I was twirling my tongue around Colby's cock when I felt Jack slide his finger into my tight ass as he ate my pussy. It was almost more than I could handle as I was filled with desire. Colby was moaning as I took his cock into the back of my throat and licked my way back up the shaft. I told Jack to come around and lay next to Colby. I looked down at the two rock hard cocks waiting for me to take charge of them. I took turns sucking and licking each of them taking them to the edge and then backing off so we could keep going.

Colby wanted his turn with my pussy so he stood on his knees behind me as I took Jack deeper into my throat than I ever had before. As I felt Colby's hard cock slide into my eagerly awaiting pussy I let out a deep desire-filled moan and planted my face on Jack's cock so far that my nose was buried in his skin.

Colby slammed his cock hard into me while I worked up and down on Jack's cock, only stopping for a moment to scream in ecstasy that I was loving being filled with cock!!! My pussy was tightening around Colby milking it as Jack and Colby both said they were ready and asked where I wanted their loads. I quickly fell onto the bed and told them to cover me like the dirty slut I was. They stood over me and blasted all over my face and tits.

I rolled over and cleaned up a bit as Colby started kissing my back. Jack knew what I was ready for without even asking me. He let Colby get me primed as he lubed up his cock. When Jack could tell from my sighs and arched back that I was at the height of my excitement he told Colby to lay down on the bed. Colby's cock was ready for more also, and my dripping wet pussy had no problem sliding down over it. With one cock deep in my pussy I was overflowing with excitement as Jack slide his cock into my waiting ass. I let out a scream as I felt both cocks fill me with their hard eager shafts. Colby started pumping on my pussy as Jack pumped in and out of my ass. I have never felt more ecstasy and pleasure as I felt both my pussy and ass clamp down on their cocks as I begged for more and to slam me harder and harder. Jack leaned down and started to bite my back and I couldn't hold in my screams any longer. I screamed out that I was going to cum all over the two cocks just as Jack pulled out of my ass and joined Colby's cock in my tight pussy. It was more than I could hold back and I felt my pussy pulsating and then blast my cum all over both of them.

I rolled over and fell into a satisfied heap on the bed as I lay in between the two gorgeous cocks and couldn't help but think this was one night I would never forget.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Sexy Story: The First Time

Even as I sit here I can’t believe I’m putting these words to paper. I never thought I would be one of the women in the stories of sexual adventures, but life has a funny way of leading you in directions that you can’t always predict.

I had been married to my husband about 8 years when our entire relationship changed. He was my only sexual partner but for years Chuck shared with me his dreams to have a threesome. It was no shock to me; he is a man, afterall. However, what I was totally shocked to hear was that he wanted to see me in bed with another man. I always thought of Chuck as more courageous than I, and didn’t think I’d ever have the guts to go through with having sex with anyone else. We talked about it on and off each time I would get so turned on thinking about it that my g-string would be completely soaked. But I never really thought it would happen. Some fantasies are meant to stay fantasies, or so I thought.

One night we were out with some friends and drinking heavily. Pretty soon I was in full on flirting mode with one of our friends, Jake. Flirting with Jake was like breathing air; you don’t even realize you’re doing it because you get swept up in him. He is a ladies man to say the least; charming, handsome and a little bit dangerous and always flirting back.

Soon we were at the bar doing shots and I felt a hand on my leg. Thinking it was Chuck I didn’t say anything. Except I realized that Chuck was sitting at the table a few feet away, so it was not his hand reaching farther and farther up my thigh. When I looked down I realized it was Jake, who was wearing a devilish smile from ear to ear. My pussy began to tingle with excitement as he leaned in and said to me “I’ve always wanted to fuck you until you scream for me to stop”. By this time my g-string was dripping wet and at any second my hard nipples could come bursting out of my shirt. I looked over and Chuck raised his glass to me, he had seen the entire interaction and from the growing bulge in his pants he was enjoying the view.

When Chuck joined us Jake took his hand away and tried to act like we were just two friends at the bar. Chuck took Jake’s hand and put it back where it had been, high up on my thigh and pushed it closer to my wet pussy. Jake realized I was completely shaved, and he could feel how wet my pussy was. Without another word we settled our bill and headed for our house.

We made it home and picked back up where we left off. I had worn my sexy lingerie underneath my dress that night so I lay out on the bed in my black lace bustier and matching g string while both men revealed their excitement in the form of rock hard cocks. Jake started to kiss me while Chuck took his tongue to my bald pussy. Soon I began to moan into as Chuck made me want to scream. I was stroking Jake’s cock which was amazing to look at. It was long, thick and rock solid. I was begging to be fucked and Chuck said it was Jake’s go first.

I hesitated for all of 3 milliseconds when I realized we were actually going to do this. I looked to Chuck for confirmation that he was OK with it and was greeted by his cock being shoved down my waiting throat. I gagged a little at the shock of how deeply he thrust it into my mouth. Having known Chuck for a long time I could tell he was more than OK with the situation by the cock pulsating in my mouth. Jake was taking his time rubbing my clit with the head of his gorgeous penis. It felt like heaven and hell all in one, I was so ready to be fucked!

I was licking Chuck’s cock all around when I started to feel Jake push his warm, hard cock into my pulsating pussy. He was bigger than Chuck, but not so much that it hurt, it was sheer pleasure. I was instantly moaning and thrashing around while I had one cock in my mouth and one in my pussy.

Chuck was about to cum and he asked me where I wanted it. I pointed to my face just in time for him to shoot it all over my waiting cheeks, eyes and lips. He took his cock and rubbed his cum all around my face and then I licked his cock clean.

Jake was fucking me harder and harder now and I felt like I was about to explode. I stopped myself just in time and managed to get the words out that I wanted to be double penetrated. Chuck was quick to his feet at my request. And we positioned ourselves so that Jake was deep inside of my pussy while Chuck lubed up his cock for round two in my ass.

Jake got me going again and I was begging for more when Chuck slowly slid his cock into my waiting asshole. The fullness and pleasure of double penetration took me over the edge and I sprayed cum out all over both cocks in an explosion of sheer ecstasy. My pussy and asshole tightened around their cocks so hard that they both came with me. We rolled over into a heap of sweaty, naked bliss.

It was a night I could never have imagined until I tried it. And it was better than I ever could have dreamed. Chuck and I were closer than ever after that night. We agreed to keep our options open about having Jake over again. And the options were certainly open the next time we saw Jake in person… but that is another story for another time...

You can call me Jane

When I set out to air my rants and raves I felt that my anonymity was key. In order for me to be able to vent the things that I really want to say is to make sure that no one knows who I am. So, meet Jane Smith, my alter ego. No, I'm no Angelina. But I put some time into my alter ego, and if you have ever seen the movie Mr. & Mrs. Smith you know the perfect suburban wife Jane had a very different life under the twin sweater set surface. That's me, and that is how I got my secret identity.

Knowing what a small community of swingers we are in, I go to great lengths to not post the same status on Facebook as I do on twitter (the ones that can be made vanilla that it...) I don't use the same pictures as are on our profiles on our various accounts, yet I wonder. Could I be found? Have I ever slipped up or let my defenses down? Has one of my playmates read the blog and recognized themselves? Would you know if I was your next door neighbor, or the girl you met for drinks last night? And would you tell me, if you figured me out?

I have shared my face picture with one person in my twitterverse and it was because I knew he lived in New England and I'm in Florida. (Although side story - I had a moment of panic when I realized this man's life was strikingly similar to a co-worker of mine (I work for a National company)... but not him so all clear) I have denied help finding us online and face pictures to all other requests (although I think The Hubs has shared some)  But I can't help but wonder if any of my followers know (or think they know) who I am in real life?

So are you in hiding too? Have you ever been discovered or are you open about your real life on your twitter life?

The Wife

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Sexy Story: Out with Friends

It's funny how some of the greatest sexual nights of your life can start from evenings that are as ordinary as so many other nights, until they turn into so much more.

My husband of 10 years, Carl and I were on a much needed night out with friends at a local bar. I was wearing a sexy new black dress, stiletto heals and some barely there lingerie. Carl had enjoyed watching me dress for the evening and I knew the thought of me in my g-string and bra were lingering in the back of his mind.

A few drinks and some heavy flirting later I decided to surprise my husband with a little gift. I went into the ladies room and slipped my g-string off and into my pocket. I giggled with horney excitement as I walked out and joined him in a conversation with the guys.

After motioning to him to come closer I slipped my panties in his hand while whispering to him that my bald pussy was too wet for these now. With a wink I left him to rejoin the girls I looked back over to Carl and found all of the guys grinning from ear to ear. From their looks I could tell Carl had told them about my "gift".

My friend, Kate saw this too and questioned me about the grinning group. I explained and she laughed and said "Oh I bet Steve enjoyed that!" She went on to confess that she and Steve, her husband, are swingers. How could I have gone all of that time not knowing that they were swingers? I nervously laughed while try hide my peaked interest.

As the night went flirtations got more intense and soon I realized it was Steve who had his arm around me, and not Carl. He leaned in and told me how his cock had gotten hard when he heard that my bald pussy was exposed under my dress. He whispered into my ear that he was struggling to keep himself from throwing me against the bar and fucking me right there. My whole body was on fire and tingling with desire. I searched the crowd for Carl and found him locked in conversation with Kate. From the looks of it she was putting the moves on him and he was enjoying it quite a bit. I knew Carl has always wanted one of Kate's legendary cock suckings and even from where I stood I could see his cock was getting hard thinking about shoving it into the back of her throat. I caught his eye and gave him a wink to let him know he had the OK from me.

By now my pussy was begging to be fucked and my whole body was electrified. Steve looked over to Carl and said "well, should we take this party back to our place"? We all agreed and we were on our way.

When we made it to their house it was all Kate could do to get Carl's pants off without tearing them off of him. Soon Steve was kissing my neck and back as he unzipped my dress and it fell to the floor. He dropped to his knees to lick my wet pussy while I began to moan.

He pulled out his cock and I started to stroke it while he laid me down on the bed. From across the room I could hear that Carl was thoroughly enjoying his sucking and was waiting eagerly to watch Steve fuck me. He told Steve I was a naughty girl and he should punish me. I giggled with delight and the thought of being "punished" while Carl watched. As Steve pushed his rock hard cock into me I let out a slow deep moan. Knowing that the sound coming from me was the sound of intense ecstasy pushed Carl over the edge and he blew into the depths of Kate's throat. She swallowed his cum load and licked his cock to clean up any she had missed. Carl was still rock hard and his cock was standing straight out in front of him.

Kate and Carl turned to face Steve and I as we fucked on the bed. I was begging for more and on the verge of squirting when Steve pulled out and blew his hot load all over my pussy. He stuck his cock back in and I rose off the bed and filled the room with my screams of orgasm delight. I watched as Kate pulled aside her pussy lips and started rubbing her clit. She was moaning and giggling when Carl suggested they join us on the bed.

I was thinking I should get a towel to clean myself up when Kate started licking Steve's load off of my breasts. It was more erotic than I ever could have imagined and I felt a strong need to suck on Carl's big cock. He came over and knelt by my head plunging his cock deep into my throat. Kate was still licking my nipples when Steve came from behind and started fucking her.

I started rubbing my pussy which was aching for attention. Carl saw this and started to finger me. He stuck his fingers inside the warm tightness and said he had to have me. I stopped sucking his cock and he repositioned to stick his cock into me. As he slide in I had to keep myself from coming, because it felt so good to have him inside of me.

He pounded me harder and harder as I begged for more. Kate was squealing as she watched Carl pounding me while Steve was rocking the bed with his thrusts into her waiting pussy. Tears began to roll down my face and I let out a huge scream as Carl and I came in unison, my pussy clamping down on his cock and milking it until he collapsed on top of me and we lay in sweaty ecstasy.

After a while we cleaned up and made it back to the car we sat for a second just looking at each other. We were both wondering how each other was feeling... Suddenly we both burst into nervous laughter and agreed this was a fantastic night.

Of course, we did end up with Kate and Steve again... But that's a whole other story...

Monday, September 19, 2011

A word of advice...

I've recently been asked "how do I convince my wife to become a swinger"...

This question is the gateway to a dangerous path. I think people either have the capability of being a swinger or they don't. Now I'm not saying everyone knows that they'd be OK (or for that matter, not OK) with the lifestyle. But I also don't think we can  or should "convince" someone. Maybe educate them, but you have to honor their comfort levels.

I am 100% positive if The Hubs had come to me talking about becoming a "swinger" I would have balked at the term alone. Well behaved, good Christian girls like me don't do such things, after all! But, he eased me into the thought. Over the years of sharing our fantasies and growing together both emotionally and sexually we were able to build a solid foundation to experiment and push the lines to find our comfort levels.

In the end you'll be happy you made sure your mate was comfortable. Nothing feels worse than looking over and realizing your mate isn't having fun. So I would advise strongly to ensure that your partner is fully on board.

By the way, my advice to the hub who asked me... start slow and tell his wife a fantasy that includes other people and see from her reaction where it goes. There may be an outward knee jerk reaction, but pay attention and see what happens. If you don't trust your partner's reaction then you probably aren't cut out for the lifestyle anyway. Just keep in mind that in the end you have to respect their wishes, and if it's a no who knows maybe down the road you can visit it again.

Would you have offered different advice, or think I'm OK in what I'm dishing out?

The Wife

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

R.I.P. Unicorn

We came to know The Unicorn from one of our online profiles. She was a mother of three recently separated from her cheating husband. She was new to the scene and we instantly felt at ease. It became the kind of friendship we had only thought of as a unicorn until then, a steady single female who was drama free!

Too good to be true, but we fell into a semi regular schedule of playing. We were able to have a friendship beyond the bedroom and I even felt comfortable to allow The Hubs to have solo playdates with her - which had never happened before. Life was good.

And then we went over to her house for the last playdate. I still can't put my finger on it, but something was amiss. She had been having an insanely hectic day so I brushed it off as that until I realized that she was particularly quiet post visit. Life moved on and we fell a bit out of touch with life activities and she was sick for a while. We get it, our lives are full too... but like I said there was just something...

Finally The Hubs asked flat out if we'd be playing again. He managed to pull it off as an upbeat I-want-you-so-bad kind of question to make sure she wasn't thinking we were stalkerish and wanting her to drop everything for us. She told him that she was starting up a relationship and thinks she needs to focus on that for now.

Well, damn... that was not the answer we were hoping for! The really sucky part is we are happy for her, while being disappointed for us all at the same time.

So, here to the drama-free swing relationship we once enjoyed. You will be missed Unicorn!

The Wife

Thursday, September 8, 2011


We have three general rules when it comes to our swinging, and #1 is a condoms are to be used for sex. No arguments, wearing a condom is non-negotionable. Most of the time I am met with the "Yes, of course" reaction to this news. After all it's 2011, we are a generation that started having sex ed in 4th or 5th grade (for me at least) we have all been well versed in the need for disease prevention. But, sometimes... sometimes there is a "but" after their answer.

The "but" is always from the married men and they all have the same answer: "I'm fixed".

Contrary to your belief, pregnancy is one of the low ends of worry in comparison to the diseases and issues that could arise from the lack of condom. I'm on the pill, I can take care of the birth control aspects of my life, but there is only one way to prevent disease. So deal or move along!

We recently had a meet and greet with potential play with a couple at their house. The Hubs and I knew we had potential for this to be a long term friends with benefits couple so we had agreed we were willing and actually hoping to take it a little slower with them. We were leaning on not playing but after the drinks started flowing we all ended up naked playing a drinking game. Naked with some kissing and touching but nothing further. Until we went to say goodbye.

The Persistant Hubs and I ended up in a dark corner of the room when I was saying good bye and giving The Hubs a moment for his goodbyes. We were kissing and he was pulling on my dress and panties. His cock was hard and I reached down to play with it through his underwear. The next thing I know he has his cock rubbing on the outside of my underwear and he said "what if I just slide this in right now"... "noooo noooo I say" trying to balance the line of letting him no it's not happening and not being an asshole freaking out (after all that was the first time he said it)... but he persisted. He tried again and I pulled him away and said his name in my best "oh-shit-Mom's-mad" voice. He snapped to (extremely drunk) and I said NO in a clear, firm and not-trying-to-sugar-coat-it-anymore voice. He got it and we broke apart as The Hubs and his wife appeared from their goodbye.

I wasn't expecting that from him, at least not the him I thought we got to know at dinner and over drinks. I have absolutely no doubt that I was never in any danger of doing something I didn't want to. I mean, a) he snapped out of it at his name and b) all I would have had to do was holler for The Hubs and he move mountains to come to my aid. And that is on top of the fact that I 100% knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that even as drunk as I was (really, really drunk btw) condom usage is always a non negotiable rule. No amount of flirting or number of times asking is it going to change.

So my eyes are open. We are having lots of discussions now before we meet again on how it's not going to happen sans condom! He says he understands, so we shall see...

The Wife

My first cock piercing

I have always wondered what it would feel like to play with a cock that was pierced. After this weekend I can tell you, I am not a fan.

The Spyman had a ring pierced on the underside of his cock, not the prince Albert shown here. (sorry guys, it's painful for me to look at this and I have no perspective on the pain level) Which meant that it flapped up and down with each lick of my tongue. Well, I'm not sure if I've told you this or not but I have quite a tongue.  It's long and big and well, I use what I was given. But - that means ever lick up the ring flapped up and then would fall into the way on my way back down. I couldn't get to my sweet spot and it was frustrating me.

If he had ever had a proper blow job from me he would have realized it was sub par by far. He was really missing out, his size was very, very close to The Hubs so I knew what I could do with him but that damn ring kept throwing me off and irritating me!

And to top it off, since we use condoms it was flat and did nothing for me during the sex. So.... kinda seems like a waste of time and a lot of pain to me. Which is unfortunate because I've wanted a clitoral hood piercing for some time and now I am left to wonder if my piercing would prevent The Hubs (and others) from finding their sweet spot. And then wouldn't we all be missing out on the fun?

Have you ever played with a piercing? What are your thoughts?

The Wife

Reserved Swinger

We recently started talking to a couple that had an all too familiar-of-late issue. The problem is talking to the swinger wives is like pulling teeth. Maybe I'm a swinger slut or something, but even with my full time job, and full time life as wife to The Hubs and mother to our kid I can find time to chat, instant message, text and or picture trade with a potential date. Yes, there are times when I can't respond to you right away, but if you want to chat I'll generally be able to. And when I chat I actually talk. I have opinions and thoughts and I'm OK sharing them and my wants and desires. After all, for me the build up is half of the fun. Let's face it, the hotter you get me the hotter the fucking with be, right?

Maybe you don't like the chatting but if you aren't talking it's hard to even gauge interest level. If we can't tell if you're interested then how do we know if we are bothering you or proceeding down the right path? I'm not saying you have to have text message sex or trade porn pics every single day, but if The Hubs reaches out to you and says "hi" at least a hello in response would at least show that you are not highly annoyed at our disturbing your day. I mean, come on - we've all had one of those stage 5 clingers who we can't quite shake. They are no fun, and we certainly do not ever want to be one of those types of people. Hell, The Hubs has one that even though at least 5 months has passed since it became clear they would never play she is still hounding him with texts. At least it has slowed from the 24/7 pace she had at the start...

After having enough of this couple I flat out asked him, is your wife liking The Hubs or what because she flat out won't even respond to his texts sometimes yet you are coming over on Saturday night to play? His response - "yes she very much likes him, she's just reserved"

Let's let that sink in... a "Reserved Swinger".... Riiiiiight...

Where to begin on this -

1. Loosen up or get out of the lifestyle. Be shy, I get it I'm shy too at first but there is no reason to be shy about a hello message. If you're that uptight maybe you aren't ready for this?

2. I know life is happening and you can't always talk. I'm not saying hold endless, all day chat sessions and ignore the rest of your life. And I get that some people are just chattier than others. But you HAVE to find some way to make it clear that you are interested or it is a) no fun and b) not going to happen! which brings us to

3. We are not going to chase you. If you don't seem interested we are not going to continue to harass you. If you are interested show it, and we'll have fun or at least explore us having fun. But please, let me be clear on this... we do this for fun, it is in absolutely no way, shape or form anything other than something we do for fun together. We have a phenomenal sex life with each other alone, so if you aren't interested cool, we're not missing out because we have each other - so again - we will not chase you.

The other problem is it is no fun for me to be sexting it up with a potential playmate if The Reserved Wife is cock blocking The Hubs. I enjoy reading what he's talking about with the other women, be it normal chatting or sexy talk. The whole thing is naughty, and that's part of the appeal for me - so when he's met with brick wall after brick wall the mood is lost for everyone!


The Wife

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Sexy Story: The After Party

The day started off like any other, but ended in a way I never could have imagined. My husband and I were hosting a party at our house with all of our friends, no special occasion, just an excuse to have everyone over for some drinks and play some beer pong.

I was already feeling charged that day so I decided to wear my short skirt and bright red g string and see how long it would take for my husband, Steve to notice. I knew it wouldn’t take very long since you can see directly up this skirt unless I sit in a certain way. Steve noticed immediately that my bald pussy was peeking out at him from across the deck as he laughed with a few friends. He winked at me and smiled as I spread my legs just a little bit wider so he could get a better view. I could see him trying to maintain a sense of calm as his cock began to grow hard knowing that at any second one of our friends could check out the same view he was seeing.

The afternoon went on with drinks flowing freely which in turn makes me extra flirty. Any time we had a moment alone Steve would pin me to the wall, pull my skirt up and finger me while I desperately gasped for breath trying not to cum and feeling electricity run over my whole body. His cock was harder each time I brushed past him and it was getting harder and harder to pull myself off of him as he bit my neck and chest in our moments of lust with our friends just around the corner.

Finally, the party ended and our friends slowly made their exit one by one. My pussy was already dripping wet when the door closed behind the last friend and I knew it was play time. I felt Steve’s hand climbing up my skirt while I stood in the kitchen cleaning up the party aftermath. I spun around to face him so I could feel his pulsating cock in my hands. He sat me up on the counter and we began to make out while I pulled my legs up and he rubbed my clit. I was lost in a sea of desire when I heard a knock on the door. I groaned at the interruption and Steve laughed as I rolled my eyes and collected myself to see who was there.

When I made it to the door I was surprised to find a friend who had not been at the party. Instead, Colby stood there with a smile on his face. Surprised that he was there I said hello and began to ask what he was doing there when he cut me off. He said that Steve had sent him a text message that my bald pussy needed to be abused and he was hoping he would be interested in helping him. My mouth dropped open as I felt my wet pussy pulse with shock and surprise. Colby and I were flirty by nature, but we didn’t get to see each other that often and we had never had the opportunity to take it any further.

Steve came around the corner laughing at my expression and invited Colby inside. As he walked in Colby’s hand grazed my pussy on the outside of my skirt and he leaned over and whispered to me that he had heard about my pussy and couldn’t wait to get a taste for himself. Before I knew it his hand was up my skirt and I was having a hard time standing as I looked back and forth from Steve to Colby. Steve winked at me as if to give his OK and with that I grabbed them both by the shirt and pulled them to the family room.

I pushed them down onto the couch and got on my knees in front of them. Unable to contain myself any longer I pulled off their pants and threw them to the side. Spreading his legs I started on Steve’s hard cock with my tongue at the base, licking his balls and then slowly up the shaft and around his head. My hands went to work on Colby while I twirled my tongue around Steve’s cock and listened to him moan with excitement. I moved over between Colby’s legs and started using my tongue to tease him as I played with Steve’s cock with my hand. I took it slow on Colby for a few licks and then shoved his cock so deep in my throat that I lost my face in his body. I came back up slowly using my tongue all around as I worked my way to the top. I heard Steve moan as he watched me begin to go faster and faster on Colby’s cock. I felt Colby pulsing in my mouth and knew he was close to cumming so I pulled away and went back to Steve. His cock was waiting for me and I took him into the back of my throat so deep I gagged on it. I kept going, deeper, faster and licking on Steve as I stroked Colby next to him.

I told them to stand up and get on each side of me; I wanted to be able to suck each of them even deeper than I could on the couch. As they positioned themselves I pulled off my shirt and skirt revealing my matching red lingerie. I took Steve’s cock in my hand as I pulled Colby closer so I could take his cock into the back of my throat. Taking turns I sucked each big cock until they were both begging to blast their loads. I pulled off just in time to sit back and get covered on my face and chest with the hot loads each of them blasted from their hard cocks.

I lay down on the floor and started fingering my dripping wet pussy. Steve grabbed a towel as Colby took over fingering me. I could feel my pussy clamping down around his fingers as I arched my back off the floor with each slam deeper and deeper. Steve began kissing and biting my neck and down my chest to my hard nipples. He circled my tits with his tongue as I felt Colby lean down and begin licking on my clit as his fingers pounded deep inside of me.

Steve stopped and sat back on the couch. I looked over to make sure everything was ok; he winked and began stroking his cock. He had a devilish look on his face as he watched Colby eating my pussy and finger fucking me. He was enjoying watching me be a naughty girl. The excitement of being watched by Steve was more than I could handle and I pushed Colby’s face deep into me as I screamed out that I was cumming as I felt my body surge as I released.

I was gasping for breath when Colby brought his face to mine and began kissing me. He tasted like my cum and it was hotter than I ever could have imagined. I felt Steve come around and reach his fingers into my still pulsing pussy as it clamped down on his fingers he asked Colby if he was ready. Colby gave a nod and pulled me up on top of him as he lay down on the floor. I mounted his cock and slowly let my pussy stretch around his thick shaft.

I leaned down onto Colby as Steve came up behind me. As Colby pounded my pussy I felt Steve kiss and then bite me harder and harder. I let out a deep moan of enjoyment as he worked his way down my back to my waiting ass. He used his tongue to lick and the unexpected pleasure made me lose my breath. Soon he was gliding his finger into my ass while Colby filled my pussy. I was frozen with the pleasure of being filled with cock and fingers. I was just beginning to think I was going to cum when Steve replaced his finger with his cock in my ass.

As he slid in Colby pounded my pussy and grabbed my tits, and the pleasure went to a whole new level. Unable to control myself I was screaming as they both pounded me deeper and deeper. Steve bent over and bit my back and I couldn’t hold back any longer. I felt both my pussy and ass clamp down on their cocks and milked them until they both pulled out and blasted on my pussy and ass at the same time.
I rolled over onto the floor and melted into a puddle of pure bliss as the boys sat back enjoying watching me try to recover.

I laughed at their expressions and told Colby he was welcomed back any time… they both laughed and Steve said he agreed, but I shouldn’t be so quick to say goodbye – they weren’t even close to being done with me yet.

Little did I know I was in for quite a bit more fun…

To be continued…