Saturday, May 31, 2014

Round Two; Part 1

Well.... I was wrong. I distinctly remember believing that The Friend and I would never fuck again. But, 10 months later I can officially say I was very, very wrong.

After we had our fun last summer things went back to normal. And by "normal" I mean the two of us flirting with each other and the line of appropriateness. It seemed he had a new found comfort of sorts with me; often telling me secrets about his escapades. Yes, that's right this slut isn't his only indiscretion. But then again, he's not my only either! So it was all good.

Then came the invitation to a birthday/pool party for my BFF, but hosted at The Friend's house. Then I heard that The Girlfriend would be out of town. HA! I thought, well this should be interesting. The Hubs heard that and started plotting. He spent all week before the party getting me worked up with dirty talk about what he and The Friend would do to me after everyone else cleared out of the party. Not gonna lie, the thought of having both of them at the same time was HOT. I was pretty much dripping wet every time he mentioned it. The catch (isn't there always a catch) however, was threefold.

First - it was of utmost importance that I NOT let The BFF or other friends find out about this. In reality they probably know more than they should about our lifestyle but really nobody wants them to find out about this particular sexcapade. Like for real. So it was key to not let anything happen until/if we were left to the 3 of us.

Second - The Friend has always been clear about his uncertainty about being in a MFM. He and The Hubs are friends, but was he sure he could be that close to The Hubs with a hard cock? He was skeptical which is why I broke my own rule of no playing alone last year when we played. The planning with The Hubs was so hot, but in the end would The Friend be able/interested if it wasn't alone?

Third - there was a scheduling conflict and it meant The Hubs was unable to be at the party until late. This meant if there was any flirtation I would have to shut it down immediately as to not fuck up the first wrinkle. And, this was my last day of drinking for a while so The Hubs & I pretty much knew I would be drunk so it was doubly important that I remember to NOT. FUCK. THIS. UP.

When I got there it was a small gathering, just a few friends with only two people I didn't know very well. They had all been drinking and swimming for a while before I arrived so I did my part to catch up. We swam and drank and The BFF's Hubs made me a drink so strong even I had to sip it slowly. Eventually the crowd changed and The New Chick arrived. She was cute; blond, good body and from the stories we'd heard quite the party girl. Pretty soon it was clear that I was not on The Friend's radar at all. He had zeroed in on his new conquest and was doing it up pretty good to score with her.

Now, let it be said I admit I was disappointed in this turn of events. I'd had a week plus of talking to The Hubs about having the two of them together and the whole fantasy was slipping away pretty quickly. I mean, even if she wasn't hotter than me (which she was) there is a phrase every man will understand - "there ain't no pussy like new pussy" - am I right? And she was new pussy and totally hotter than I am, it was a total no-brainer. So I had determined that it wasn't going to happen. The saving grace was I'd still get to go home with The Hubs and he would be the sole benefactor of my built up lust. No longer worrying about my alcohol intake I lived it up. I honestly have no idea how many drinks I had but I was no longer feeling awkward or anything else. I was just a girl hanging with her friends having a good time.

The Hubs arrived, the party continued and eventually the crowd dwindled. Eventually The New Chick decided it was time for her to leave. We all watched as The Friend did everything he could to get her to stay, literally walking her out to the car for one last chance. We all soon realized he had never come back from walking her out. I went inside to investigate. (hello, nosey!)

I found him sulking in his bed, alone. She had denied him and he wasn't thrilled. I came in and gave him a hard time about ditching all of us etc. He told me how he'd really wanted her to stay and how he'd been told she was such a party girl but she had just left, and how could she have just left??? I laid down next to him but not with him and listened to him bitch and moan about getting rejected. I guess at some point he then realized that I was still there and he decided to ask me for just a blow job. "Just stick it in your mouth for a sec" he said. Yea, right I thought - even in my drunkeness I knew it would not be a "just the tip" situation and I was NOT going to fuck up the only rule The Hubs had given me. (see catch #1) I somewhat convinced him to come back to the party and we both stood up. He then grabbed my bathing suit bottoms and stuck his finger into the top V of my pussy. He remarked how I was always so wet and he loved it. I told him again we needed to rejoin the party. His response was to push me down on the bed and climb up on top of me. With both had our bathing suits on and I wrapped my legs around him and explained that we couldn't do this right now because The Hubs had specifically asked me not to do anything while The BFFs were around. Just then the bedroom door opened and there stood The Hubs. Once again he was running interference for me and informed us that others were wondering where the hell we were. I followed The Hubs and eventually The Friend came back to the rest of the party.

The crowd dwindled more and more and eventually it was just the three of us and The BFFs. The boys were in the pool discussing how they wanted to go to the strip club later that night. Again The Friend was showing no signs (despite what we had just done) of wanting to stick around to hang with me so again I determined nothing was going to happen.

Eventually The BFFs left, and then there were three.

To be continued.....

The Wife

Friday, May 30, 2014


Remember The No Show? Well out of nowhere my kik went off the other day. And low and behold this is what I found:

After I finished laughing out loud I was set to respond with a smart ass reply but The Hubs said I shouldn't even bother with any response. So I left it.

I guess some could argue that he was trying to be polite. Trying to do the "right thing" but really I don't see it that way. I keep going back to the same question in my head as it is a month later - WHY BOTHER?? Clearly you don't give a fuck about being a dick that night. So why would you even bother reaching out again. We have had zero contact since that night so again - WHY bother?!?!?! All I can think is he thought I would be so desparate for a fuck that I'd be like Oh, no problem come over now. Fuck. That.

I mean, really???

The Wife

Sunday, May 25, 2014


A note from me before you read... I'm sharing this because it is what is going on in my life currently. I am not seeking your thoughts on sobriety and or my choices for substances I partake in. Please read this blog post if you wish, ignore as you wish! Either way, I'm not looking for a lecture or comentary on alcohol and or any other drug.

If you've followed along for any period of time you probably already know that "sober" is not often used to describe me. No, I'm not an alcoholic, I'm not a drug addict. I just don't think there is anything wrong with partaking in such pleasures when doing it "responsibly"*.

I drink. And I smoke weed. Frequently. However, there are times when sobriety is a neccesity. And for right now, I'm in one of those phases of life. For medical reasons I've had to give up weed for the past 2 weeks. At some point soon I'll have to give up alcohol for a while too. If things go as planned I'll be without those and any form of those for about a year while my body goes through some stuff. Yes, I'm fine. No, I don't plan on telling you what is going on ;)

Would I have chosen to give these things up? No.

Am I sorry I did? No, this is a greater good kind of situation.

Do I plan on going back to using them both when I am able to again? Without a doubt.

Does that make me an addict? No! Am I addicted because I "miss" them? No. I honestly don't believe that. I drink socially and responsibly and I use weed not to par-tay down, but more for it's medical benefits.

See, for me, a chronic overthinker and anxiety sufferer, weed helps like nothing else. Yes, I take daily medication perscribed by my doctor but really it only takes the constant roar of anxiety down a peg or two. Whereas weed helps turn the volume almost all the way down. I actually have a blog post about this which is stuck in forever-draft status as sharing would probably be too personal**. Here is an excerpt:
I am an over-thinker. A constant-wonderer. An over-analyzer, and I. Hate. It.
"Just stop!" You say? Not so simple. Oh how I wish it was. It may be the biggest pet peeve I have about myself. And if you know me, that says a lot.
Because of the constant over-thinking I'm almost never truly comfortable. Even with people I know and trust I think deeply into their words, actions, inactions etc. I wonder, I ponder and I replay it all over and over again in my head. Usually it just leads to more unanswered questions.
Pretty much I'm a big ole bag of crazy. But, I manage to deal. Now, being completly sober it is a little more complicated to deal. But, in the long run I'll manage. Like I said... it's a greater good situation and afterall it is only temporary.

So hang in there with me, kids... it's going to be a crazy ride...

The Wife

* I put "responsibly" in quotes because lets face it, is there a "responsible" way to partake in illegal drugs like pot? Not really, but - am I doing it when in charge of children? No. So I that's what I mean by "responsible"
**Yes, I realize that I am willing to share my body and my stories but consider my rambling about my crazy as "too personal"

Thursday, May 22, 2014

The "Single" Male

The top theory of The No Show is that he was married/attached and that is why he dropped off the face of the planet. I'm going with that one or a stupid Catfish situation. Either way, it is annoying when people are untruthful about their status. In fact, I recently sent out a tweet saying something about how this or that was "probably married"... I was asked "is that a problem?" and the answer to that is not as easy as it may seem.

I'd be a big ole hypocrite if I said I was anti-married people. I'd be an even bigger one if I said I had an issue with if the person had permission or not. After all, The Friend is in a long-term relationship and we all know how much that stopped me... And helloooo, I am married too. So clearly I'm ok with blurring the lines.

Here is the distinction though. If you are honest and say to me up front that you are married/attached and you do not have permission I may not like it (cheating is really a nasty thing) but if all of the other factors fall into place who am I to judge you? But... it does adds an extra layer of complication. And that is, if nothing else, annoying.

Some examples:

Now on top of schedules, interest, location etc we have to contend with the fact that we're trying to keep something on the DL from your partner. That means I need to remember when I can and can't text you. And really, do I have the time or brain power to remember such things? No! So chances are at some point I'll accidentally reach out to you when you're unable to talk. So have a good story ready. Or save my name in your phone as a guy's name.

It takes all spontaneity out of the playtime. True, as a parent The Hubs and I don't have that much "spontaneous play time" but on the rare occasion after little people are asleep we sneak a playmate in for some fun. This is almost always a "hey lets see if blah blah blah can play tonight" rather than a planned event. If you're married/attached you're probably working around your wife/girlfriend's schedule. Meaning there is no booty call.

I ain't got no time for your drama. This hasn't happened yet...knock on wood...but I have low tolerance for drama. I don't need an angry woman calling me up or God-forbid showing up on my doorstep because I fucked her husband/boyfriend. Seriously, ain't nobody got time for that...

So I try to not find guys that are attached, but all of you men out there playing on the DL for the love of all things you gotta be honest about it with your playmates. Otherwise you're more likely to fall victim to example #1 leading to example #3. And I repeat.... Ain't NOBODY got time for that.

The Wife

Thursday, May 1, 2014

My Type

Have you ever sat down to examine your partners and wonder what similarities and differences they have to each other? Do you have a "type" that you gravitate toward?

I often joke that while growing up I was always attracted to blonde, preppy boys. Then I met The Hubs and ended up marrying a brunette who isn't particularly preppy ;) But in reality it wasn't that I changed my type, it was that as time wore on my preferences evolved and continue to do so. The clearest example of this is one that The Hubs loves to tease me about. That is, bald men.

If you had asked a 20-something version if I'd be drawn to the bald look I'd probably have laughed at you. Even knowing that The Hubs was genetically predisposed to join this group I couldn't imagine myself "enjoying" the look on anyone but him (and him mostly because I love him). Now, in my 30's I find myself attracted to these cue-ball men. (* think Bruce Willis, Jason Statham sort of bald. Not George Costanza)

Maybe it is because there are so many men taking the scalped option over the dreaded comb-over of yesteryear but the Mr. Clean look kinda works for me. Maybe it is evolutionary in preparation for if The Hubs does follow in his family footsteps (so far he hasn't and that is longer than any other dude in the family) Maybe it is because so many of the men in our age range are bald/balding these days. Any way around it, it is working for me. 

So if you're on the fence about shaving off that comb over, I say go for it! I can't be alone in this new found enjoyment :)

The Wife