Wednesday, October 5, 2011

The Pea

Do you remember the story of The Princess and The Pea? The Queen puts a pea under the mattress and no matter how many cushions are brought in the Princess still feels the pea...

Recently I discovered there was a pea under the mattress for The Hubs and myself. A few months ago I found The Hubs starting to pick up the term "Hun" (side note - I still don't know where this came from in 15 + years I've never heard him use this one) For some reason every time I heard it or read it I would cringe. Like make me uncomfortable cringe. Which made no sense, even to myself as I felt/feel 100% confident in the solidarity of my marriage. But there was just something about it...

I decided that I would not tell The Hubs about this until I could determine if I was just being sensitive. After all, I know that at least once a month I'm certifiably crazy. So I thought about it,  I tried to place my finger on what exactly the issue was but no matter what I couldn't pin point the origin of the yuck factor. I had no explanation other than it just rubbed me the wrong way.

Eventually I decided to let it go and just chill out. It was never that I felt uncomfortable with The Girl, or with The Hubs and my arrangement so there was no reason to keep stewing on it. Quickly that word died away and the problem was solved on it's own. Then last week The Hubs was reading a conversation I had with a male playmate. In the message I called our friend "dear", which I tend to do a lot. I use "dear" on vanilla, non vanilla even sometimes on work people. But this time it made The Hubs admit that he really didn't like that one.

I started to laugh as he tried to explain his objections to me. I didn't need any explanation, for me his discomfort is enough for me to move on and he wasn't mad at me. But  I couldn't help but think of the "hun" freak out a few months earlier. I told him about it and we talked it out and laughed at our inability to explain ourselves.

It was a reminder that no matter what your standings are, arrangement is or comfort level with your spouse there is always the possibility of  finding a pea under the mattress. And as The Princess found out in the story you can't ignore the problem, you just have to find and fix it.

Luckily for me The Hubs and I are very good at our "no explanation needed" policy. If it doesn't work, it doesn't work period.

So what do you think? Ever have a pea type issue like us?

The Wife

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