But, why? While I'm not entirely sure myself, I have boiled it down to two main reasons (that I can identify).
The first is, I am an exhibitionist. I never really knew how much until I got busted on twitter by a real life vanilla friend. I made my twitter profile private, changed my pictures to graphics and started keeping a low profile. And it was BOR.ING. Even though I don't post that many pics anymore I get a thrill out of showing off my hidden naughty side.
And, let's face it. Fucking around with a real life friend is the ultimate exposing yourself, isn't it? Which brings me to my next theory; The good girl.
In my real life I've always been a "good girl". My group of friends may see a partying-Jane or hear stories of craziness but deep down I'm thought of as a wife, mother and (mostly) a somewhat-behaved woman. Also, being a very self-conscious person, male attention is always surprising to me. So it is even more surprising when someone who knows me as the "good girl" that I am in my vanilla life sees me in a sexual light.
I mean, they know me for me. Not the twitter persona, no internet strength to make me more appealing. Just me. And they still want to fuck me. (Side note: I choose not to believe all men would fuck free pussy just because it's free and that these guys are actually finding me appealing) Not the me they think they know from flirting texts trying to set up a play date. Not the me that fills their timelines with TittyTuesday or ThongThursday pictures Just plain old me. And that's fucking hot.
I don't know, maybe it's just the extra taboo of it all. But it's wrong. And it's naughty. And complicated. But, hot-damn it does thrill me sometimes.
The Wife
Can you share your AFF profile name? I'm on there also.
ReplyDeletei'll share mine if you share yours...
DeleteMaybe, like you said, it does have something to do with a bit of a taboo. However, why is there any need to compartmentalize the relationships in the first place? Online or off, why ignore a spark if there is something there to be seized.
ReplyDeleteI think we all know the answer though. Offline vanilla society isn't even really open to the idea in a lot of ways. This leaves us often times with the option of having to choose between a social relationship and a sexual one, and risk losing friends.