Saturday, September 28, 2013

The appeal of real life

With having accounts on AFF, SLS, going to Eyz and being on twitter you'd think the idea of real life flirtations would be unnecessary. Why potentially fuck up a real life friendship for one night of naughtiness when we have so many "sources" to find playmates. Yet... It happens, more than once

But, why? While I'm not entirely sure myself, I have boiled it down to two main reasons (that I can identify).

The first is, I am an exhibitionist. I never really knew how much until I got busted on twitter by a real life vanilla friend. I made my twitter profile private, changed my pictures to graphics and started keeping a low profile. And it was BOR.ING. Even though I don't post that many pics anymore I get a thrill out of showing off my hidden naughty side. 

And, let's face it. Fucking around with a real life friend is the ultimate exposing yourself, isn't it? Which brings me to my next theory; The good girl.

In my real life I've always been a "good girl". My group of friends may see a partying-Jane or hear stories of craziness but deep down I'm thought of as a wife, mother and (mostly) a somewhat-behaved woman. Also, being a very self-conscious person, male attention is always surprising to me. So it is even more surprising when someone who knows me as the "good girl" that I am in my vanilla life sees me in a sexual light. 

I mean, they know me for me. Not the twitter persona, no internet strength to make me more appealing. Just me. And they still want to fuck me. (Side note: I choose not to believe all men would fuck free pussy just because it's free and that these guys are actually finding me appealing) Not the me they think they know from flirting texts trying to set up a play date. Not the me that fills their timelines with TittyTuesday or ThongThursday pictures Just plain old me. And that's fucking hot.

I don't know, maybe it's just the extra taboo of it all. But it's wrong. And it's naughty. And complicated. But, hot-damn it does thrill me sometimes.

The Wife

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

How To Survive a "Dry" Wedding

You may recall The Hubs and I had a bachelor/bachelorette weekend a few months ago for friends who were getting married. Well, for budgetary reasons only the couple cut booze out of the reception. Making it a dry wedding. This didn't sit too well for our friends and we (read: I) decided to take matter into our own hands. Here are my tips to surviving a dry wedding. 

Step 1: ignore the Bride telling you alcohol is prohibited and stop at liquor store for "travel-size" booze. (I was buying for my car of 6)

Step 2: Don't forget gum to mask the liquor-breath smell. After all, should you be caught you're getting kicked out. So keep it on the DL. 

Step 3: Fill your flask with additional booze. We chose Bacardi. 

Step 4: Start early. "You can't drink all day if you don't start at breakfast" should be your motto. Early drinking means less chance of getting caught at the wedding. We started with bailey's for our coffee on the trek to the wedding location. It was delightful!

Step 5: Pace yourself. If you are sucking down your "soda" in 5 minutes someone is bound to notice that you're extra thirsty and start watching you. 

Most important of all - keep that shit to yourself. If everyone starts hanging at your table for contraband word will spread quickly. Then, you're fucked. 

After that just chill out and enjoy your drink you've worked so hard for.

The Wife

Monday, September 23, 2013

When men talk

The Hubs always tells me how he and "the guys" rarely discuss sex. But every once in a while I hear about discussion amongst them about this or that. And I would be completely full of shit if I didn't admit that when The Hubs brags on me or my skills I am instantly turned on. Like, big time. 

Once, a few months ago he was in discussion with The Friend. It was on a trip and somehow they got talking about me and the possibility of us hooking up. The Hubs was (once again) assuring him that this is how we work and it really would be ok. But what I remember the most from the story was one particular phrase. The Hubs told him that I may not have the model-perfect body; "but, she fucks like a Ferrari".

Hello, a Ferrari? Me?! 

It was several days later when I heard the story and it instantly made me wet and tingly. What a compliment! 

Months later it still has the same impact just thinking about it. Every once in a while The Hubs'll drop a random Ferrari comment into conversation with our friends. It gives me the same reaction each time. Instant turn on at just the memory of his bragging. I wonder if he even knows what it does to me. If he even remembers dropping that phrase about me or it is coincidence. Either way, I think of it. Every single time. And I secretly smile and do my best to hide how I'm squirming until I can get The Hubs alone and his cock deep in my throat. 


The Wife

Sunday, September 22, 2013

The Big Fuckup

Let's see, where to begin.

I have mentally written, rewritten, deleted, and vowed never to write many times over the last few weeks. Yet here I am actually starting a draft. Maybe I just need to write it out. Tell my story, get it off my shoulders. Maybe somewhere deep down I feel the need to confess. Maybe there is a part of me that thinks the blog readers wouldn't understand a lot of situational issues if I didn't share this story. I don't really know. 

Maybe it will just be a draft forever.  

I will start with one forewarning; there will be very few details. The situation is extremely personal and for several reasons at least for now I don't want to tell the whole story step by step. So you'll just have to wonder. 

So here goes...

I fucked The Friend.

Yup. He had a window of opportunity, I had a horny husband encouraging his wife to be naughty. So, after a long day I grew the proverbial balls and went to his house. 

So here are your details: We did not use a condom. He was beyond drunk and did not cum. He got a little rough with bites on my chest. I was there almost 4 hours. And most importantly the fuckup(s) are entirely my fault. (Not looking for pity, just trying to be honest)

The next day the tension between The Hubs and I was palpable. I was nauseous and I feared what was coming. He told me that afternoon that for several reasons he was not ok with some of the details of the encounter and he didn't think it could be repaired. 

Our marriage was in serious danger of being over.

Insert crying non-stop for several hours. Silently in front of my family, loud weeping when I was alone. 

See, a funny thing happens when you think your marriage is over. Much like the stereotypical near-death experience we hear about in movies, flashes of our married life passed before my eyes. All day I saw images and memories played out again and again. The way he left his pallbearer duties and came from across the church at my grandmother's funeral to be by my side as I lost it. The way he cried when I told him we were pregnant for the first time. And the way he held my hand when we found out we'd never hold that baby in our arms. The look on his face when our son was born, and how sweetly he snuggled him every night as soon as he came home from work. And on and on and on. Every memory flooded my heart with so much pain, knowing how much damaged I had caused. 

All of this because I didn't listen to my gut. Sometimes it doesn't matter what you hear with your ears you know something different in your heart. And I should have listened to that little voice telling me it was a bad idea instead of the slut thinking about being naughty. There are some things that can't be undone. Some pains that can't be un-felt. And I should have known better. 

Later that night The Hubs and I sat down to really talk. And slowly but surely we started to pick up the pieces. Are we whole? No, not yet, I still have a lot of forgiveness to earn. Like I said there are some things that can't be undone. But everyday we are working to put it all back together. 

What will become of my friendship with The Friend? Hopefully nothing. I hope that it will remain the same comfortable, flirtatious, fun friendship that it has always been. I'm sure we'll never fuck again but he is fun to flirt with and I'd like to hope that our friendship hasn't been ruined too. Of course, The Friend doesn't remember most of it. So, basically I almost ruined my entire life and he was too drunk to even remember it. 


So, that's the story. Please don't be offended if I haven't or don't respond to inquiries. It's nothing personal, just how I'm gonna roll with this one. 

The Wife