Yes and No

Long time no blog... I think you'll understand why shortly. I contemplated talking about this at all but what the heck, in real life there are things that happen that impact your Swinger Lifestyle. This is definitely one of them...

A few weeks ago The Hubs posted the following on Twitter:

We both waited to see if anyone would take the bait... Only one couple was like umm... WTF?!?!

So the question is, am I? Is it?

Yes and No.

Yes, we're expanding our family. We'll welcome another (our last) kid in early February.
No, it is NOT The Friend's baby! We know this for sure even though we did conceive a few days after Round 2.

Does this mean our Swinging is over?

Yes and No.

This is a complicated answer - so try and stay with me. If we had a steady playmate I think both The Hubs and I would be OK continuing our playtime for a while based on how I was feeling etc. However, at the moment the closest thing we have to a steady is The Friend. And, well he doesn't know yet but when he finds out... I'll be back to a Manatee for sure. And who knows if I'll ever return to Mermaid status.

The irony of all ironies is that when you're pregnant sex is even more amazing. At least at the beginning. The Hubs says my pussy is extra ripply (totally made that word up) and in some positions his cock feels like I'm being fucked and using the Hitachi at the same time. WIN. So ironically this would be a great time to play, but that really doesn't seem to be in our cards so it will be a benefit for The Hubs and me to enjoy.

The No comes into play in that we know this is our final kid. I already have a sense of completion about this one. Something I was always wondering if I'd have or if I'd always long for another cute snuggely baby. So I do think that we'll get back to the fun times as time moves on. Plus, if you've ever been to Eyz Wide Shut you know that there certainly isn't an age limit to swinging. My goodness, sometimes me in my mid-thirties is practically infant status. That and after I lose the baby weight I'm getting the boob implants I've always wanted. So um, why not have fun with them??

Do I miss the drinking, the smoking, the excessive fucking?

Yes and No.

When we went to happy hour with our friends last week was it a semi-bummer to not get a nice cocktail, sure! But that is life, this season will pass and I'll have the rest of my life to be a drunk, high slut. I've come to realize that life really is just about seasons. Nothing lasts forever, so not drinking or smoking ganja is just a season of life and this too shall pass so I'm OK with that. Plus, it's a greater good thing, ya know? If it was "just because" then I may be resentful of The Hubs for being able to partake, but this is for a purpose.

So, for now I'm a pregnant slut. So there won't be many new stories coming out of the blog for a while, but I'm sure I have plenty of old material I can hash out. That is, if this post hasn't sent all of my readers running for the hills!

Until next time...

The Wife

The Hubs

Today is The Hubs birthday. I don't often talk about my main man on here in depth because I tend to stick to the random stories that keep you guys hungry for more. But, in honor of his 30-something birthday here are 25 reasons (in no particular order) I love this man.

1. His eyes - they are so damn pretty. They are super clear light blue and most people get sucked in to how pretty they are.

2. The way he loves me. Yes this is general. But I'm not the easiest to love. He's stuck around way longer than anyone not genetically related to me.

3. He is THE BEST hugger. One of the first things I fell in love with. I mean seriously, when he wraps me up in his arms I could live there. Like for real.

4. He still makes me tingle. Like full body.

5. If I'm ever stranded on a deserted island or kidnapped by terrorists (for what purpose I don't know) I KNOW he'll come for me. He's just that guy. There are other people who may look for me but would soon give up. I know he wouldn't.

6. I turn everything into a joke. So he hears an almost non-stop dialogue of thoughts. On occasion I really get him with something funny. When he really laughs hard at one of my jokes it spurs me on like no one else.

7. The way he knows stupid little things about me like I don't like my sandwiches cut in half if made at home. Dumb, yes but it is the little things.

8. How I still catch him watching me dress or undress. 17 years into our relationship there isn't much left to hide. Yet the man still watches me undress or dress. It amazes me constantly.

9. How he can read my moods. Ok, so sometimes it drives me a little crazy. But whatever. He totally gets it. There is no hiding my pissiness from him.

10. His smile. Especially when looking at out spawn.

11. The Father he is to our spawn. In fact, he almost insisted on bottle feeding just so he could do half of the feedings. What man do you know that WANTS to be awake at 2 am feeding a crying baby?

12. Speaking of which - the way he loves our spawn is #12. Fully, unconditionally and in his own way so different from how either of us were raised we have made a little family and it is clear the way he loves the wee people in our home.

13. The way he can fix almost anything! Seriously, the mechanical and practical intelligence this guys has amazes me constantly.

14. When I catch him (or he admits) watching me as I shower through the cracked door. Maybe that creeps you out, but to me I know it's motivated by lust, which is hot.

15. The way he encourages me to be dirty and slutty. Fuck, he does 99% of the work finding people for ME to fuck.

16. The way he can read my mind. I can't tell you how often I'm thinking something and then suddenly he says the exact words in my head. Sometimes it's kinda creepy he's so accurate. I'm talking like exact words.

17. His ears. He hates them, I love them. Sure they stick out a little but who cares. I think they are adorable.

18. The way he took care of my post c-section. (Yep, I'm a mother but my who-ha has never been stretched out, score for the inner slut!) I'm not going to get into TMI details but let's just say when my sister heard about how he was caring for me and the things he was willing to do she said he deserved Husband of the Century medal.

19. How he constantly protects our family. He is one of those people who trusts no one and is constantly looking for lurking danger. Which is great because I tend to trust most people and never think anything bad is going to happen. Good combo, right?

20. How unendingly patient he is when he coaches our kid and 17 other 4-6 year olds. I mean for real, I often sit watching him deal with the crazies thinking WHO is this man????

21. How sometimes I'm getting dressed or doing laundry or something totally unsexy and he comes up behind me and shoves his cock deep in my pussy. Kinda like he HAS to have me NOW. HOT.

22.  How he makes the nightly rounds checking out the doors, dog, kids and doing a  security perimeter check multiple times a night while I saw logs.

23. How he has seen me in every imaginable shape, form, version of myself and still never actually says when he isn't impressed. Sure I know which version is his favorite (it's mine too) but he never says OMG, DUDE why are you so nasty. Even when he comes home and I'm still in my pjs from a long day.

24. How we can have an entire conversation without speaking a word. A few Christmases ago we were at a dinner party and from across the table I said "Hey, baby can you pass me that mushroom?" "sure" he said as he reached for the exact one I wanted. Simple, yes. Did it blow the mind of our friends? YES. It's the things like that. Sometimes we see something or someone and just the look says it all. We know exactly what we're going to make fun of or discuss as soon as we are alone.

25. For being mine. We share each other but at the end of the day he's mine. And it's one of the best things I love about him.

Happiest Birthday wishes to my love. I'm so eternally grateful that your Dad didn't pull out.

The Wife.